rantcloud http://rantcloud.posterous.com goodbye blue sky posterous.com Thu, 24 Nov 2011 17:03:00 -0800 Cowboys, Aliens, Human Centipedes. http://rantcloud.posterous.com/cowboys-aliens-human-centipedes http://rantcloud.posterous.com/cowboys-aliens-human-centipedes

Tweetcentipede
Okay, so I watched "Cowboys and Aliens" and gave it half a star on flixster. It's just terrible. Let me explain.

I grew up with films in the '70s and '80s that exposed me to new ideas - ideas that, at the time, had never been realised on celluloid. Whether it was Harryhausen or ILM bringing the ideas to life, the ideas were new to cinema.

So, Cowboys and Aliens (C&A) - on paper it's quite promising. The reality is shockingly bad. I had lowered my expectations before seeing this movie, but I did not lower them anywhere near enough. It's just inexcusable that this movie should insult your cinema experience. It's the sort of thing I'd expect on the channels that show man-eating anaconda films peppered with octopus vs megashark. Not only that, but C&A is over two hours of Daniel Craig's tight-fitting trousers and it's just too much - especially when the only female gets drenched in water without even so much as a proud nipple. Disappointingly sexist. And proof, if any were needed after Indy IV or that cop flick he did, that Ford's career is over and he should stop embarrasing himself by "acting". He's around the same age now as Connery was in Indy III - the difference in talent is staggering. Connery gets respect, Ford just gets SMH.

So why Human Centipedes, aren't those films an outrage to the senses, part of the liberal agenda to poison young minds and - I don't know - gross them out. Well, I have to say I think the first one was treated unfairly, and the sequel more so. Certainly the first one isn't a great film, but I did think it was well made and treated the subject matter okay. Which is not to say I get a thrill from ass-to-mouth, but it did present to me something I had never seen before, that had never occured to me before. It was a "new" idea committed to film. The sequel is next on my watch list for the same reason. Despite the subject matter, it promises to have a level of intelligence and self-awareness sorely lacking in the orange-and-teal Hollywood shit of today. I don't want to lap up big-name Hollywood's shit, like I am way down the chain of the human centipede. I want to challenge myself - not by enduring boring shit like C&A - but by having ideas presented to me, wrapped in a story that might even provide a little subtext.

I'd rather be grossed out by a human centipede film than by Daniel Craig's arse, thanks.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Tue, 04 Oct 2011 10:37:00 -0700 Pick A Side Pisses Over The Middle Path http://rantcloud.posterous.com/pick-a-side-pisses-over-the-middle-path http://rantcloud.posterous.com/pick-a-side-pisses-over-the-middle-path

Goerings
I'm noticing a disturbing trend as people are empowered by the internet and encouraged to become "leaders". The marketing mantra "polarise people" is being taken out of context and applied to produce statements such as:

Support Apple, and all the others that do this. and you support totalitarian Communism and hate freedom.

Say what? I hate freedom because I choose to use Apple devices? What the fuck are these people smoking?

How about

If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.

Or, Swiss?

 

Now, I understand the sentiment of both of these statements, but they both achieve absolutely fuck all. They are empty without action, yet more apathy in a sea of fucking second-hand quotes made by people trapped within the ancient Greek dualist mode of thinking. There is a third way, but marketing gurus refer to this as the "mushy middle" and to be avoided if you want to get stinking rich. So, "polarise people" and you are showing your true colours and your complete disregard for moderate, adult debate.

You're either with us or against us in the fight against terror.

 

Well, guess what? I can do that too!

If you polarise people with douchenozzle statements behind a shield of morality or faux patriotism you are a cunt and an athiest and are complicit with the freedoms brought to us by Rupert Murdoch and his media machine. Otherwise, you're probably a nice level-headed person who questions authority and deserve to be prosperous.

Debate closed.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Sat, 25 Jun 2011 03:48:46 -0700 Final Cut Pro X Killed The Post Production Industry http://rantcloud.posterous.com/final-cut-pro-x-killed-the-post-production-in http://rantcloud.posterous.com/final-cut-pro-x-killed-the-post-production-in
Fcpx_crash

Honestly. I can see what happened here but years of pressing buttons for clients and deriding fun-loving wedding videographers has salted many professional editor's brains and shrivelled them like blinkered short-sighted slugs.

I get it. The guys who sit on their arse all day are running out of excuses to justify prehistoric working practices. Suddenly they have to think about upstream- and downstream- and they realise the zombie movies took all the brains.

Well, I get it. And this time, I'm keeping a secret so that BUFI may profit from the knowledge.

I'll give you a clue.

Before the printing press came along, everything was handwritten by scribes. Apple doesn't follow curves; it jumps curves. Get used to it, or get out. Apple waited until viable alternatives returned to the Mac platform (Adobe Premiere, Avid Media Composer) so they have actually done you a favour. Apple are encouraging you to take your business and your legacy best working practices elsewhere so Apple can once again become the place of leading practices and champion of the free-thinking artist. A bicycle for the mind.

Think different. Brain required.

Get over it. Use Avid. It's what you should have been using in the first place as a professional editor, no? Not something with "pro" in the title, not ever.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Wed, 29 Dec 2010 01:04:00 -0800 iPad Killer Apps, iPad Killers http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/12/ipad-killer-apps-ipad-killers.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/12/ipad-killer-apps-ipad-killers.html Or, how I learned to stop worrying and love the end-user experience.

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Soooo ... come the new year I am selling three Android handsets to fund my iDevice obsession redux. There's definitely a future for Android as a dominant platform, but no Apple crumble just yet either.

How did this happen?

When iPad was announced, it was an exciting foray into tablet computing so obviously starting out right. I was tempted back then (what, April?), to own what I am convinced will become a collectible piece of computing history. However, Apple then sued HTC and made me wonder what all the fuss was about with Android. Turns out, Android is very very good. However, right now, for, iOS is excellent for me. 

I bought my iPad (3G capable, waiting for the SIM card to be delivered any day now) from the Apple store in the Bullring shopping centre, Birmingham UK. It was kind of a leap of faith based on no more than a total of 10 minutes hands-on time and many articles of rhetoric along the lines of "what's the point of iPad". Indeed, what is the point of iPad?

My particular circumstances.

I've recently finished editing a feature film on my iMac and the house is in the process of being turned into a children's day care. I am being turfed out of "my room", iMac and all. You can see where this is going. Without ease-of-access to my desktop computer then a portable device makes a lot of sense. If the iPad could stand-alone I'd ditch the iMac. As it is, I will need occasional access to sync iTunes - the bane and single biggest disadvantage of the Apple UX ecosystem. There are annoying workarounds, of sorts.

There remains one weakness and utter reliance on iTunes. I can use, say, iCab to download an mp3 but there's no way to get that mp3 into a playlist on the device without jumping through the Mac/PC/iTunes hoop. Disappointing. That's the only thing that is really really going to annoy me during this arrangement and make me despise iTunes even more.

Observation: I could have got a laptop, even a netbook. But I firmly believe that iPad sets me on the path of the future of end-user computing (whether it is Apple based or not, the iPad is not only a great portable touchscreen device it is also a fantastic thin client - remember those?!)

So whilst Microsoft fumble to port Windows to ARM in the coming years (why the fuck bother?!) the rest of the world will be moving forward, spearheaded by Apple and Google, probably for the next 5 or 10 years until Facebook makes net neutrality debacles look like the declaration of independence. 

I mean, the iPad 1.0 has 256MB of RAM. That's measly by Windows requirements and yet the iPad blows the fuck out of every Windows personal computer I have used, ever. Tight code by Apple is the only explanation. It shows Windows in such a bad light I can't believe anyone would choose it as their personal computing UX.

Markets diverge. It's a contemporary example, no? Windows isn't going anywhere for now, but its branch may be beginning to rot.

Anyway. iPad. Let me count the ways. The killer apps of iPad.

1. UX. User experience. Waking from sleep is instant. Sleeping is instant. The iOS is extremely responsive (though I have to admit, not entirely perfect every time - and as seems customary I have found a dead pixel on the screen, bah).

2. UX. Installing and uninstalling apps. Does it get any simpler than this? Another testament to Apple's coding design decisions.

3. UX. You know how iPad is a giant iPod Touch? Well it pretty much is, with a teeny tiny motherboard inside. Guess what? The rest of that iPad is essentially a big battery. This adds to the game changingness of iPad - the battery power won't last forever but neither will you be fretting about where the next power outlet might be.

4. UX. They're not lying in those videos about typing in landscape mode. I can type as fast in landscape on the iPad as I can on a fullsize real keyboard. I don't know if I could write my next screenplay without investing in a Bluetooth keyboard for my iPad, but I am confident that if I have to, I won't get RSI (unlike extended durations of typing on iPhone's keyboard - yakkkkk).

5. UX. My favourite iPad apps are those that have been designed for iPad's 9.7" screen. It's a massive ergonomic win in my book, information is somehow presented more appropriately on iPad rather than, say, in overlapping windows on a desktop machine.

And the killers of iPad.

1. File I/O. It's just a massive pain in the arse managing files via iTunes. Take my iCab downloaded mp3 as an example. If could import that into a playlist in the iPod app on the iPad and have it sync to iTunes when it is convenient to me (or - shock! - OTA) then I'd be pretty happy.

2. Multitasking. Probably due to the 256MB RAM, iPad does not keep as many apps instantly available to switch to (compared to iPhone 4 which has 512MB RAM). It's minor - but one of the thousand cuts that contributes to a future killing. An example here is Friendly For Facebook - once it gets kicked out memory it takes a few seconds to start up again. Yeah, seconds. That's not instant though, is it.

3. USB peripherals. Just forget it (eg audio interfaces and microphones) until you see official support (eg like the camera connection kit is officially for, you know, cameras).

4. Printing. Although I rarely print, you'll need an officially supported printer to do the AirPrint thing. Else there is the iTunes hoop jumping, or seeing if an app like ePrint can get to the thing you're trying to print.

5. iTunes required for activation. Just ridiculous. Other than data rape by Apple I can't think of why this should be a requirement in the second decade of the goddamm 21st century.

One more thing.

I also think Apple should bundle their iPad case/jacket with every iPad - it's very useful both in terms of protection and ergonomics in my experiences this last couple of days.

And a further footnote - this is likely the last blog post from my iMac (I'm doing an iTunes sync, see) - in all likelihood the next will be from BlogPress or some alternative iPad app. Because BlogPress allows you to select media from the iPad. AFAIK, using Mobile Safari or iCab won't allow me to select media from the iPad (I like to head each post with a dumb pic as you may have noticed) though I suppose I should actually test that assumption before calling it out.

Goodnight!

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Sat, 18 Dec 2010 22:44:00 -0800 iPhone Scrobbling http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/12/iphone-scrobbling.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/12/iphone-scrobbling.html
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So I'm back on iPhone and kind of pissed at iTunes as per usual, especially when it comes to scrobbling (not the rusty shave kind). Although Last.fm's OS X app will scrobble from iTunes desktop app after a sync or something, it's kind of a kludge. Why can't I scrobble directly from the iPhone? Natch, there's an app for that.

I tried a few. Heed my advice that Scrobbulous and iScrobble Premium just aren't worth your money until they sort a few issues out. In the mean-time, my recommendation is to use iScrob because it's the simplest, cleanest looking (especially if you cough up to remove the ads) and most stable app I tested. And it works reliably. And it accesses the iPhone playlists directly so there's no dicking around creating new playlists in the app. It allows you to send your love. It does not allow you to tweet or facebook your listening habits like the other two, but that's no big deal - because iScrob hasn't crashed once - unlike the other two that gave me problems within minutes (this is where I really miss the frictionless Android refund process).

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iScrob

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Mon, 13 Dec 2010 20:52:00 -0800 Freedom vs Terrorism http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/12/freedom-vs-terrorism.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/12/freedom-vs-terrorism.html

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Submitted by: ray3c

Posted at: 2010-12-13 03:08:43

See full post and comment: http://9gag.com/gag/58200

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"

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Tue, 16 Nov 2010 16:29:00 -0800 Retina Display Wallpaper, Mine http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/11/retina-display-wallpaper-mine.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/11/retina-display-wallpaper-mine.html So I was looking for a non-offensive wallpaper to show off the pixel density on my iPwn 4. Couldn't find one so instead took an HDR pic of a piece of paper and scaled and cropped it to my liking. You might like it too. I'm thoughtful like that.

Unless BlogPress fails spectacularly then here it is, probably need to click for full size.

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- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Mill Rd,,United Kingdom

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Sat, 13 Nov 2010 12:03:00 -0800 iOS 4.2, iPhone 4, Gmail, Push and Me http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/11/ios-42-iphone-4-gmail-push-and-me.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/11/ios-42-iphone-4-gmail-push-and-me.html The right way. My way.

Unsurprisingly the Apple iPhone 4 running iOS 4.2 still does not support Push when autoconfiguring a Gmail account.

Fortunately, Gmail do support it. Through, errr, Exchange. ActiveSync.

This is how to setup your Google calendars, Google Contacts and Gmail to remain masterful in the cloud without bothersome 'Fetch' schedules or any needed third party push app.

Firstly, check which calendars you actually want to sync with from http://m.google.com/sync - visit it from Mobile Safari from your iPhone and pick the correct device (I have three iPhones listed, two of which I no longer own).

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Also (although I have not tested on iOS 4.2) if you try a hybrid solution (Exchange Push for Gmail, and standard Gmail iPhone setup for Notes/Contacts/Calendars) then Push email and the rest of the things will work well enough, but third party apps that try to send an email will fail - you will find the email sitting in your 'Outbox' on your iPhone. However it's only because I didn't remember to select my calendars in the first place that I even bothered to try the hybrid approach. I much prefer the idea of keeping my Google services as my master versions rather than getting that syncing feeling over how things are going to behave.

Also, uncheck to sync Contacts to the iPhone via iTunes. You can still sync OS X Address Book to Google Contacts of course, just be clear about which you regard as your master copy and backup accordingly.

Got that. No? Tough. I never said this would be as easy as cancelling your MobileMe subscription (where you need access to your Mac for access to your master copies of everything - perhaps not such a bad idea if you are not yet cloud confident).

So, setup on the iPhone. You know, I'm done typing. Hopefully the pictures can do the talking (yay for iPhone screenshot function):

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 Select Exchange.

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 Put in your details (Email and Username is your Gmail address).

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 After 'Next' put in m.google.com into the Server field.

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 Select 'em all, why not.

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 I like to sync a month's worth of Inbox rather than 3 days.

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 I'm just paranoid that 'No Limit' may lead to some future race condition I don't want to deal with, ever. A month's fine. It's not like I can even remember what I archived yesterday. (Deleting from your Pushed Gmail Inbox will archive, not delete, trust me I'm a stranger from the internet).

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 Default Account will not be On My iPhone, thanks.

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 If you didn't rename it, yours will be called 'Exchange'. Fool.

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 Doublecheck Calendar settings are to your liking.

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 And which Calendars you want Push synced. Note that your colour scheme will differ from your Google Calendar. You can sit in the corner and cry about this, just keep out of my way.

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 This is a remaining anomaly. I have no idea why this second Birthdays shows up. Deal with it: uncheck it. Out of sight, out of mind. Probably some Google Calendar Labs feature I have dicked around with, who knows.

That's it, done. It's a little sad that non-hybrid means Notes won't sync with your Gmail label Notes, but it's a small price to pay for something I don't really care about anyway. I do care about emails from other apps sitting in the 'Outbox'. Maybe one day I'll re-test the condition but that day isn't today.

I typed. I'm too good to you.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Tue, 26 Oct 2010 21:18:00 -0700 Eating Humble Apple Pie http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/eating-humble-apple-pie.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/eating-humble-apple-pie.html
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Imagine for a moment that you do a lot of reading on your portable pocketable device. Of the two screens above, which would you find most comfortable to read?

And that, my friends, is when I realised my 'droids were destined for the sandcrawler.

"Less is more" - seemingly, every goddamn time. For as long as Jony Ive stays at Apple I really need to learn to stop being so (expensively) curious about other platforms.

It's not that Android is a bad OS, far from it. In some ways Android is set up to allow innovations far earlier than they'll show up in Apple's eco-system (unless they are from Apple directly).

I don't believe Android is particularly fragmented either, but waiting for decent upgrades from the carriers or phone manufacturers can drive you nuts. Not to mention some strange handset design decisions, Samsung: "I know! Let's include a fixed internal 8GB SDcard and refer to it as external logically and have the physical external SDcard mounted off the internal logical external - how could that confuse anybody?!".

iPhones and Droids, let me count the ways:

iPhone 3G - Cracked plastic back. Dust under the screen. Fucked me right off after spending loadsa money to import it from Italy where it was sold unlocked (it was not sold unlocked in the UK at the time).

Nexus One - Stupid bug that means multi-touch can flip axis on you and fuck everything up. Absolutely awful audio recording components in my opinion. Pentile matrix to drive you dotty if you look too close.

Samsung Galaxy S i9000 - Pentile matrix to drive you dotty if you look too close. Stupid SDcard arrangement. Android Froyo 2.2 promised for "End of August" - it's now October and it's not available in the UK. Other annoying Samsungisms throughout the OS like no stock music player and some stupid stuff that assumes you must be running Windows.

Dell 5" Streak - Kind of endearing, but again no official Froyo after promises to the contrary. An annoying "slide to unlock" bug that means unlocking isn't as reliable as it should be and it occurs frequently enough (even on custom ROMs) to fucking piss me off. Some stupid framebuffer that fucks everything up to landscape mode even on vanilla ROMs - I prefer to be primarily in portrait mode, thanks.


Now for every annoyance there are some very good points about each handset. But it's the little things, it really is. Especially if it is your primary portable device. These little things get noticed. A lot.

Roll on next week and iPhone 4. Let's hope I don't shatter the thing. In the mean-time, I'll steal what time I can from my daughter's iPod 2G when she isn't using it.

(Oh, and all empires do crumble - Apple no exception.)

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Mon, 25 Oct 2010 12:12:00 -0700 Beast Released http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/beast-released.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/beast-released.html
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Sometimes it's just too much.
I don't lose it often, honestly I don't. And when I do, I usually lose it here on the rant cloud. This morning was different. I apologise to all concerned.

Trivia.
Like most things, the catalyst was trivial: attempting to rescue a borked install of a printer on a Windows 7 laptop. Windows 7 - that OS that is marketed as user friendly but in reality has hardly changed in 15 years. Let me explain.

Printer Hellspawn.
To de-bork, I like a clean slate. That means uninstalling whatever the poor soul who made the first attempt did. Simple, right? Reboot. Login with an administrative account. Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month). Take a look at the printer queues installed. Right-click - Remove device (in this instance the printer). F5 to refresh. Oh, it's still there. (Bear in mind I am in a bad mood because Royal Mail have currently lost a £1000 package I sent, payment for which is needed to keep a small business running another month).

By this point I'm pretty pissed and lose my rag. (Note, there is no  internet at this location so a search for help cannot be done and it's not like I want to waste more of my life on this stupid issue when I have far more pressing issues to deal with - the very reason I had requested in the first place that the printer and laptop be brought back to base for me to fuck it all up personally from a known state).

I ask if I can take the laptop home and destroy it. Request denied. Well that's just asking for it isn't it?!

KA-BOOOOOOM!!!!
Eight months of stress is released through gritted teeth, language and spittle. The Mother of your children is probably not the best person to be on the receiving end.

She doesn't understand the full context, and perhaps I shouldn't expect her to.

I'll fallback to that famous Marilyn Monroe quote, paraphrased, no doubt; "If she can't live with the worst of me then she'll never get the best of me".

I'll cool down. I fear the damage is done.

THANKS MICROSOFT WINDOWS. A fucking OS of all things to be driving wedges into my relationship. Death by a thousand cuts, destroyer of souls.

Another reason the simplicity of Apple's eco-system can be worth the financial cost in the realm of personal computing (as opposed to enterprise computing which will always have fallout from letting users, you know, use it), if it strictly limits the emotional abilities of The Beast.

Well, I'm rambling now. Time to pick up and wash-up.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Sat, 23 Oct 2010 20:23:00 -0700 Once Bitten Twice Double Strength Kool Aid http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/once-bitten-twice-double-strength-kool.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/once-bitten-twice-double-strength-kool.html
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Much as I love the 'droids, I have come to the conclusion that they just aint there yet. Sure, the Nexus One is full on Google but moving across the landscape from Acer (Liquid) to Dell (Streak) to Samsung (Galaxy S), one thing sticks out in my mind - these guys over promise and under deliver. This means you have to fall back to the modding community, which is great n' all, but with more stressful things about to kick off over the next few months I really don't want to be dicking about with custom Froyo and Gingerbread ROMs - I need a tool that just works with minimal effort. I might whine on (and on) about iTunes but I have 5,822 tunes in there and 148 apps. It's slow, sure, but effortless and reliable. Shit, I even use MS Office for business, is that such a crime.

What's weirded me out is after mucking around with a friend who is an Apple diehard (we were testing out Facetime, I was using the OS X beta version) and then cursiously going back to my kid's iPod Touch 2G for a play I had an epiphany - Apple really do know their design shit.

I mean, I knew that already of course.

But after 10 months of Android system level tinkering it just became instantly apparent after 'slide to unlock' on the iPod Touch that this was a device for using, no tinkering required. I may have saved myself from impulse buying loads more iPhone apps over the last year, but instead spending time rather than money on maintaining the 'droids. And basically having no fun. I mean, that nails it. Dicking around with apps on the iPhone is fun. Dicking around with custom Android ROMs is a little tedious after several months.

So for the same reasons I can't be arsed to jailbreak iDevices, I can't be arsed to continually chase the perfect Android experience and never be finding it. I need to save that time and spend it elsewhere.

Therefore, tonight I am trading money for convenience. I still intend to keep the Apple fanboys honest mind you.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Thu, 14 Oct 2010 20:53:00 -0700 Client Server Apple Crumble http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/client-server-apple-crumble.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/client-server-apple-crumble.html
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You know, I'm somewhat skeptical that Steve Jobs is particularly running Apple nowadays. The Steve Jobs I knew would never allow "magical" in marketing material because that just is not a word good designers and clear communicators use. Maybe he's just gotten old and fuddy-duddy, like your grandfather running Apple.

When I switched to Apple for my personal computing in 2003 it was because a PowerBook was essentially a peer-to-peer device, a free outlaw on the network. All the Microsoft stuff was (and still is) slave to some other thing, whether it be a domain logon or checking in for the latest antivirus definitions - ie classical client/server no matter how you cut it.

Today, I see freedom in the way Google operate and allow you to access your stuff from practically anywhere with nothing more than your Google logon and whatever computing device you have to hand. Now, technically this is still a client/server relationship of course, but it seems no less inconvenient than carrying the keys to your front door (which, presumably you don't leave open to just anyone). The Apple eco-system on the other hand has become weighed down with client/server of old - just look at iTunes and the way it is (and still marketed as) your "digital hub" - your server. Which might not be so bad if management was effortless and not time consuming. But, it is. Even my kids (8 and 11) have remarked how slow iTunes is to sync. As a consequence they don't sync. If only iTunes could sync effortlessly and frictionlessly OTA (that's 'over the air' for anyone who's been using Apple products for too long and has never seen the acronym before because you are being left behind like you were left behind in the nineties) then the management of iDevices in the household might not seem like such a godawful drag. I mean, seriously, no user accounts on an iPad? That's not personal computing; therefore cannot be eroding the PC market.

So what's my point? My Android phone is essentially a peer-to-peer device, a free outlaw on the network ...

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Wed, 06 Oct 2010 06:30:00 -0700 Politics http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/politics.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/10/politics.html
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For the first time ever I have personally been affected by the decision of the local Parish Council. In order to keep a revenue stream alive I am reluctantly selling my premium sound gear (Sound Devices 702T, Neumann RSM191 etc) on eBay UK. Much as I want to be mad and want to rant, actually kit ownership is not all that it's cracked up to be. So they tell me. Maybe in a couple of years I'll pick up a Sennheiser 418-S and a Nagra LB-S (mmmmm ... Naaaagra). In the mean time, gone are my days of truly independent sound recording with my own gear.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Mon, 30 Aug 2010 13:05:00 -0700 Bank Holiday Zorkphone Revelation (dude, I got a Dell) http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/bank-holiday-zorkphone-revelation-dude.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/bank-holiday-zorkphone-revelation-dude.html
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Yeah yeah, the zorkphone turns out to be a Dell Streak and you are now hugely underwhelmed because box shifting companies run by Texans just aren't as sexy or as desirable as fruity companies within a walled garden with child locks.

Short version: if you can think past the form factor FUD and you get on well with Google's Android, this device from Dell does not disappoint.


TL;DR
The Dell Streak is the first Dell device I have ever used that hasn't been directly subsidised by intel (that I know of) and hasn't been strong-armed by Microsoft. It's ARMv7 instruction set running Android OS and it aint half bad. Neither intel nor Microsoft anywhere to be seen (except for some vaguely MS Outlook apps that I have no use for because I'm googled up). It proves that once Dell become independent of both intel and Microsoft (and now have a fully formed free-to-license operating system to use), they have a chance of providing homegrown devices and creating new categories. Whether Dell has the balls to break away from Wintel is another question altogether, although I guess the current court cases might help that along. Dell need to stop thinking about making money and get back to making meaning. Anyway, enough Kawasaki marketing bollocks, the universe really doesn't care.


Carry On Camping
So this last few days I've been field testing my Dell Streak, quite literally - camping in the New Forest at the Sandy Balls Holiday Centre. In the Cornfield, so no electrical hook-up. Using the stock 1530mAh battery with only car journeys giving opportunity to recharge. The battery holds up really well for a device with a 5" LCD. While using it as a SatNav (with the official Dell windscreen mounting kit) it would also charge at a reasonable rate (but still nowhere near as quickly as when mains connected). However, next time I need either to take spare batteries or a portable battery pack or do a lot more driving. That's just life with this type of 'phone. Battery life is easily on a par with other smartphones I have owned, used - iPhone 3G, Nexus One, Acer Liquid, Samsung Galaxy S.


Mobile Internet Device
Yes. I said phone, not tablet. There may be many reasons Dell chose to market this as a tablet (the chance to sell £25 cables because not being a "phone" means it is not mandated to have a microUSB charging connector, etc) but it's too small to be considered a tablet and - yes - a little larger than what most people consider to be a mobile phone. What is it? A new category - one that seems to have no name and that is the biggest failing of Dell's marketing. It tries to be "me too" when in fact it's the first in an unknown category. Dell should be working harder to name that category and be the first in it. Being first makes them a leader in the category. I will say though, that Dell did well to not call this thing the Dell Mini 5 - calling it the Streak makes it more identifiable, and aids word-of-mouth. Let's hope they don't go mad with the Streak brand by expanding, diluting and ultimately dooming it with brand extension.


The Killer
1. The 5" Screen
2. If it had an Apple logo on the back you'd believe it.
3. Android OS
4. Brilliant as a SatNav
5. Speaker volume, louder than any of the other phones I mentioned above.

The Bad
1. My screen has developed a single dead pixel and it annoys the hell out of me. I have the manufacturer's warranty but it was bought from Dell UK direct and I'm really not sure I can be bothered to put myself through the customer "service" grinder for the sake of a speck that I could reasonably persuade myself is no worse than all the dust and fingerprints.

The Ugly
1. Accessories are somewhat overpriced. I see the windscreen mounting kit has recently been reduced, fat lot of good that does me.

The Universe Doesn't Care
1. No microUSB port (replacement cables are an eye-watering £25).
2. No visual notifications when the phone is sleeping (can't see them in my pocket anyway).
3. No dedicated search button (can't say I've missed it even for a moment).
4. Side mounted headset jack an odd choice for a pocket-able device (get a bluetooth headset anyway).
5. Dell really want me to use this device in Landscape. I say fuck 'em, I still prefer Portrait.
6. Camera is average by contemporary standards, shit by DSLR standards (like all phonecams).
7. Ships with Android OS 1.6 (2.1 is available for those wanting to get their hands dirty).
8. People I spoke to called it "like a small iPad".

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Tue, 24 Aug 2010 11:37:00 -0700 Terms of Endearment: my zorkphone http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/terms-of-endearment-my-zorkphone.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/terms-of-endearment-my-zorkphone.html Thanks to a serendipitous typo my 'droid sidekick is currently named zorkphone. You must have guessed what it is by now, but for those who need further clues, I took some snaps with my Sanyo Xacti (which it has to be said, is a better video camera than stills camera).

The zorkphone faces its first extended real-world test out in the field, quite literally, in the next few days. We will be camping out in a field, somewhere in the New Forest. Will its size prove to be a burden? I certainly think its size will be an asset during the navigation phase of finding the camp site using the zorkphone's satnav. I don't think it will help light a fire or catch fat rabbits, though I could be mistaken.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Thu, 19 Aug 2010 15:23:00 -0700 Dorkphone: Great Expectations http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/dorkphone-great-expectations.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/dorkphone-great-expectations.html What do I want from my dorkphone?

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Pleased to see you.
A large screen. I've gone from iPhone's 3.5" to the Nexus One 3.7" to the Samsung Galaxy S 4" screen and I'm still left wondering .... what if it were a Droid X at 4.3". I'll never know. The Leprechauns have picked, packed and shipped my dorkphone - which has a 5" screen yet reportedly still fits in any normal person's trouser pocket. I guess I'll find that out in due course. It's due to arrive Monday.

Easy reader.
If there's one thing I've found myself doing a lot of on my smartphone and superphones over the last couple of years, it's reading. Not ebooks (I still prefer real books that don't short out in the bath). I read a lot of RSS feeds. It's how I get my news and opinions. Also within the last year or so, Twitter. Another stream of text. Not forgetting venerable email. Anything that makes these things easier to read without messing too much with the original formatting is all good in my book.

Usual suspects.
Of course, I also want great audio, GPS, compass and all the other goodies that come with the high-end. Even the worst video recorded by today's phones is a world away from the awful awful shockingly bad video phones were capable of just a few years ago. HDMI out (via a dock, bah) is a bonus, though it does mean I'll have to upgrade my CRT. Yes, my living room is from the late 20th century, hasn't seen an upgrade for over a decade.

If the dorkphone can manage all that - and everything I've researched so far says it does - then I may even reveal the dorkphone's identity assuming you haven't already guessed (c'mon, it's not that difficult!)

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Wed, 11 Aug 2010 21:01:00 -0700 Windows 7 and the Classic Theme "Rainy Day" http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/windows-7-and-classic-theme-rainy-day.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/windows-7-and-classic-theme-rainy-day.html Call me old fashioned, but if GUI components are tacked on after thoughts I figure I may as well use the underlying forethoughts. So, although I've probably spent a total of two minutes using Windows 7 on my iMac's Boot Camp partition (to use Samsung and Acer phone flashing utilities, thanks Android) the "revolutionary" (by Microsoft standards of mediocrity) Aero interface compositing engine thing just looked annoying in conjunction with the 15 year old bits of Windows 7. So I go to the Classic Theme. But where is Slate? Egg Plant? Lavender? Desert? Slate? But most importantly, what the fuck have Microsoft done with their best classic theme ever, Rainy Day? Is this some cynical ploy to guide you towards Aero and it's annoying annoyingness, to focus you on the lipstick instead of the pig? The polish instead of the turd? Well one man's polish is another man's "for fuck's sake turn this crap off NOW".

Classic. Theme. Calm. But I've been using Rainy Day on Windows pretty much day-in day-out for 10 years (day job, see) and either I'm conditioned to it, or it's the best theme ever. Especially when I found those Amiga cursors to complete the retro feel of an OS past its prime.

I could go on and on and on about how Microsoft .theme packages just don't seem compatible between OS releases, but instead I'll tell you just how much work I went through to get Rainy Day back on Windows 7 where it belongs for the next 10 years.

Okay, so I still have access to XP. If only there was a way to export the theme from XP and import it to 7. Nope, for all Microsoft's talk of "life without walls" you just realise that walls keep the fucking roof up you dickheads.

Enter Jasmin's 3D Color Changer (3DCC). It runs on XP. Turns out it runs on 7 too. So now I can export from XP and import on 7, no thanks to Microsoft, but thanks to a small piece of (seemingly discontinued) donationware and the fact that after 10 years not a lot has changed with Windows except exception handling to guide you towards Microsoft's corporate lipstick. Yes, I first used 3DCC 10 years ago on Windows2000.

So anyone else pining for a simple ungarish Windows theme, I present to you my Windows 7 Classic Rain Amiga theme with FCUK variant (both mute sounds, both incorporate the old Amiga style cursors). Because I'm too lazy to upload individual files I just zipped who load of crap up for your downloading displeasure. Click here to download (862K). Use at your own risk, I can't help it if you're stupid, but I will assert that all files are virus free but without warranty or any comeback - it's the internet, dig?

Click the pic to revel and admire in Rainy Day in all it's glory (yeah, I tweaked the title bar, so suck it down) and relive the days when Blackcomb and Longhorn were almost exciting.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Sun, 08 Aug 2010 18:45:00 -0700 UK Samsung Galaxy S Review http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/uk-samsung-galaxy-s-review.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/08/uk-samsung-galaxy-s-review.html
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Okay. Let me say this: if you want a hassle-free device then the Samsung Galaxy S (aka SGS) with JF3 firmware is not it. If you don't want to think, please stop reading right now and get an iPhone and get on with your life. If you want to think and save some squids then an Android device coupled with Google cloud services (gmail etc) will give you something very close to iPhone 4 with iOS. Where the iPhone has a 3.5" 3:2 ratio screen, the SGS has a 4" screen and a "longer" 16:9 ration screen. The iPhone 4 has a "retina" 960 x 480 display, the SGS has 800 x 480 "pentile" matrix AMOLED display. There's no doubt you can see the pens and tiles in the pentile up close, but I'll take 16:9 over 3:2 thanks.

Let me also say before I forget to mention it - running Froyo on the SGS, Samsung have implemented an easy method to take a screenshot that Google would do well to steal (press and hold "back" then click "home").

Basically since Samsung as near as damn it supply bits and pieces of the iPhone 4 BOM means that they share very similar components and spec. The SGS does try a little too hard to look and act like an iPhone which is a little bit sad but easy enough to revert with third party apps from the Android Market (eg LauncherPro).

So you get it, the Samsung is similar and more cost-effective than iPhone 4 despite sharing and in some cases exceeding the iPhone spec. Sound familiar?

Anyway, what follows is pulled from a bunch of notes I wrote as I got acquainted with the SGS (bear in mind I was coming from a Nexus One running Froyo and an iPhone 3G before that).

There's no camera flash. Hurrah! I fucking hate cheap LED camera flashes that do more to contribute to a bad photo than a good but low-contrast (and shock horror grainy) photo.

It's very light. I like that. It might not be as macho as your gay icon unibody iPhone, but who's counting ismisms.

It looks iPhoney (old style 3G). I think this will put people off, and lead people to compare to the iPhone and say things like "it's got not flash" and "it's light so it must be a girl's phone look how macho my iPhone 4 is".

The UK version does have a front facing camera. Fuck that, I'm not shaving to answer the phone, go straight to voicemail you cnut.

No trackball. Big fucking deal. I haven't missed it once. Swype has cursor keys. Use them.

No visual alerts. Oh big fucking deal, you mean you could see your visual alerts on your Nexus One when the fucking thing was in your pocket? Douchenozzle.

Battery life - easily gets me through a 12 - 22 hour day depending how heavily I use it. I don't have a set routine, sorry. It's on a par with the Nexus One and iPhone 3G - no better, no worse, that I've noticed. I could always buy a spare battery and swap it out, and no doubt extended battery packs will be forthcoming.

I'm not a fan of Samsung's tweaks to vanilla Android. Of course, being that this is open source Android, Samsung have released source code and now it will just take time and a few hacker geek types to get an Android build as Google intended, which I will likely prefer.

Judging from the performance of Asphalt 4 HD (a racing game), this could set the bar for what an Android gamer's device should be. Not that I care since I don't do a lot of gaming on any platform.

TV-out - got it, though you'll need to buy a cable (Nokia CA-75U will do it) and it's SD only out of the minijack. There's also rumours that the USB port will output to HDMI in a future build, though I'm sure Hollywood would like to squash that one sooner rather than later. Go to the cinema you cheap shit!

I rarely take video using phones, however running about with the SGS and reviewing the results on my 24" iMac screen - this reminds me a lot of the early '90s when I would run around with a Chinon Super8 and project the results on my wall. The SGS does a pretty good job at auto-everything. It won't replace your dedicated videocam, but I can see the day when app-phones will be used as auxillery cameras then embraced by indies and outlaws for sure (I mean like within the next ten years, not the next ten weeks). Audio quality? A not too stunning 16kHz (32kHz would have been tolerable, 44kHz would have been great, 48kHz would have been all you need) - Apple SoundTrackPro reads the bit depth as 32-bit which I'm not convinced is correct (was expecting 8bit or 12bit or 16bit) - however listening back it does seem to sound pretty good on recording voice. So maybe the 16kHz/32bit combo (if it really is 32bit and not just STP getting confused) will do fine for near-proximity voice intelligibliity. Go double system anyway.


XXJF3 firmware seems to have memory management problems, whereby the phone doesn't efficiently close out unused programs from memory which leads to lagging (swapping), and recently a couple of total phone lock-ups needing a hard power-down and reboot. Oh dear oh dear.

So to fix this (and so far so good), I rooted (an easy application of a certain update.zip) and run MinFreeManager. Need to leave things running "as normal" a few more days to see if it has fixed anything. Hopefully they'll be an official firmware from Samsung soon to tidy up these bugs else they're gonna be pissing people right off. Also take a look at MoDaCo and XDA device specific forums. Since I wrote about MinFreeManager there's been better ROM releases that don't need it. Though nothing official from Samsung yet as far as I know.

iSyncr has been updated specifically to support the SGS, hurrah!


Froyo XXJP3 firmware (based on Google FRF91) fixes a lot/all of my performance gripes. Slated for release at the end of September 2010, SGS + Froyo final will be a great combo (though not as awesome as Froyo AOSP on SGS would be …) - do check the XDA forum if you're running pre-release XXJP3 to find out how to change your build.prop parameters so that the unstable JIT is minimised (heap size 24mb is working for me).

So currently if you want the best from the SGS you'll have to get your hands dirty. It really depends what your time is worth. The iPhone 4 is around £200 more than the SGS (comparing unlocked versions) and MobileMe is a further subscription on top (though the free Google services do work well on the iPhone).

So, if iPhone 5 is £200 cheaper than a top Android handset, has at least a 4" screen with 16:9 ratio - I could well switch back.

Hahaha just fucking with ya.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Tue, 27 Jul 2010 15:48:00 -0700 Uninformed Ignorant Biased UKFC Rant http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/07/uninformed-ignorant-biased-ukfc-rant.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/07/uninformed-ignorant-biased-ukfc-rant.html
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Seen it all before, will see it all again.

The United Kingdom Film Council abolishment is being carried out by the coalition government, acting upon intent of the previous Labour government.

People despise farming subsidies yet movie making subsidies are OK? Because, isn't that what the UKFC was best at? Attracting foreign films to UK shores (note: American productions are classified as foreign) and subsidising them with UK Lottery money. If the UKFC was doing such a good fucking job, why don't any UK directors stick around to make movies with the UKFC (Ritchie, Vaughn, Nolan ...) - I mean, "Gosford Park" hailed as a great UKFC was directed by Robert Altman (god bless him). Huh?

"Sink or swim", I hear the argument. Yet, for the rest of the fucking world not being subsidised that's exactly what we all have to do. And some of us do sink. Badly. Choking, claustrophobic fear filled deaths. Can't rely on handouts of free cash, we have to fucking earn our own cash with our own blood, sweat, tears and broken families. A lot of us swim. Some taken by the currents, a lot taken by the under currents, but hey, head above water, that's swimming, right?

And why is everyone blaming the cock-sucking Tories when it was decided under the previous lazy Labour government that they were going to disassemble their gentleman's club quango before they drew attention to their crooked accounting. Okay, I made that bit up about the accounting. Believe me. No, really I did. The UKFC was an above board quango in every way. They in no way took all that Lottery money and lined their own pockets and made their own films and fornicated whilst visiting big American film sets. Really, they didn't. Trust me.

Thankfully the BFI remains unscathed, however since there are close ties between BFI and ex-UKFC, I do wonder how much UKFC pollution will find its way into the BFI. Mind you, as people keep reminding me, the BFI is a charity, so it's obviously not worth raping. I mean, it's library of British culture, home of the BFI Handbook and LFF, totally fucking worthless for 80 years, compared to the ten year old UKFC failure. Right?

What we really needed was regional arts boards plus UKFC because, after all, films aren't fucking art are they, how can a film be made by a fucking arts board? No, it needs to have "film" in the name or the dumbfuck filmmakers won't know they can get money, and jesus do you want to see another film made by a douchenozzle art student? And how would an arts board ever communicate how great the UK was for making films, with lots and lots of starving actors and crew who will work for food.

Of the wholly British movies funded by the UKFC, I don't know any of their names, so did UKFC spend any money on marketing? I guess not. "Sex Lives Of The Potato Men", yeah thanks for that.

But UKFC licked arse on lots of American productions, so that makes it okay. That makes a British film industry which is not much about Britain (HELLO: Hogwarts is not representative of British culture, though it is a very successful ripoff of 'Worst Witch')

Fuck it. I like American films, but I don't want to subsidise them (disclosure- I don't buy lottery tickets so of course I'm not fucking subsidising them). Send our greatest directors to Hollywood and let the rest of us bathe in our money-starved mediocrity. Now that's true Art.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71 Fri, 23 Jul 2010 15:31:00 -0700 Pod People, Robots, Monkeys http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/07/pod-people-robots-monkeys.html http://rantcloud.posterous.com/2010/07/pod-people-robots-monkeys.html
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It used to be you could happily be a robot or a monkey. But lately I've noticed there is definitely a third category emerging, or, perhaps it has just been dormant. As we all know, a robot is likely to use cold hard logic do make decisions based on choice (perceived or real). A monkey - well, a monkey likes shiny things and is good at busting car aerials - cheeky monkey just wants to have fun and let others worry about the details. The pod person it seems, cannot comprehend that anyone has a thought process that may differ from their own. In a very self-centred way they perceive they are right (usually backed up with marketing bullshit they corroborate with in some emotional capacity) and often become extremely passive-aggressive by slinging backhanded complements to anything they see as threatening their perceived dominance in a situation. This is usually to stop the monkeys considering that robots might be onto a good thing. Because robots are brand disloyal (despite the word originating from the Polish word for slave - then again, how many slaves would actually be loyal to their masters given half a chance?!) the fun loving monkeys are the targets of the pod people (but if any robots can be re-programmed so much the better).

Why?

Monkeys are more likely to be followers than leaders (whereas a robot is generally just going to be a result of its programming) - sure, monkey alpha male, but every alpha has his cheeky fun loving followers. So these pod people position themselves as alpha male monkeys, and frequently offer shiny things. It's a lot easier to get simple rewards-based loyalty from a monkey than it is to reprogram an entire robot.

It's not clear to me if pod people are the result of robot monkey experiments, but clearly they exist. And, they annoy my programming.

Though, I do like shiny things and I'm pretty furry.

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]]> http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/1249992/hellohellocropola.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he6CjOhc7NA7w miker71 miker71 miker71